


Love in a Temperature Controlled Climate

by London9Calling



Series: Love In: Only the Finest in Exo Animal Crack [3]
Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: Animals, Crack, Don't Take This Too Seriously, Fluff, Humor, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-29
Updated: 2017-07-29
Packaged: 2018-12-08 08:09:05
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 10,704
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11642448
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/London9Calling/pseuds/London9Calling
Summary: Love is scary. Especially if you are a raccoon in love with a skunk or a dog in love with a rabbit or a house cat in love with....





	Love in a Temperature Controlled Climate

**Author's Note:**

  * For [shinealightrose](https://archiveofourown.org/users/shinealightrose/gifts).



> For my BCF Sara. Happy Birthday chingu!!! *throws all the confetti* Thank you for helping me become a better writer. NOW ENJOY THE ANIMAL CRACK
> 
>  
> 
> Cast of Characters  
> • Minseok as the street smart grey tabby cat  
> • Lu Han as the pampered Persian house cat  
> • Yixing as the pigeon with secrets  
> • Zhi Xiang as the pigeon with bad pick-up lines  
> • Minho as the overeager and apologetic golden retriever  
> • Junmyeon as the dramatic rabbit  
> • Chanyeol as the nut obsessed squirrel  
> • Jongdae as the sewer dwelling opossum  
> • Sehun as the am-I-a-pervert raccoon  
> • Baekhyun as the kinky af skunk  
> • Jongin as the shy rat  
> • Tao as the leader of the cockroach army  
> • Yifan and Kyungsoo as humans
> 
> /Sorry for any typos, I'm tired OTL/

Lu Han sat on his carpeted tree, his long white fur splayed out against the maroon carpeting. Somewhere behind him his human servant was humming a tune, the sound of paint bottles being opened accompanying the song.

Lu Han ignored the background noise in favor of making his own racket, peppering Yixing with questions through the screened window.

“He really did that? I can’t believe it. What did the other guy do? Oh wait, don’t tell me. He ran! He ran away!” Lu Han gushed, his green eyes dilating as he gushed about his favorite topic.

Yixing, a drab colored pigeon with an easy going personality, nodded his head. He sat on the ledge outside Lu Han’s window, a familiar sight most days. “Of course he ran away! Who wouldn’t?!”

Lu Han purred dreamily, staring off into the distance. “Minseok must be the most amazing cat to ever live.”

“I’m not sure I’d go that far,” Yixing reigned him back in. “There are a lot of cats out here, Lu Han.”

Lu Han’s purrs stopped instantly. It was a sore subject. There was so much going on outside and he was stuck...here. In a brick building, round brown food in a metal dish, caught by his human servant who didn't even let him find his own water source (another metal dish). Once monthly visits by another servant who brushed something through his hair until his coat was pristine.

Lu Han knew he was royalty, his mother had told him so. When he was a kitten he was sent off like all the other royal cats, to live with a human ~~slave~~ servant and be sheltered from the world. Yet...he wanted more, a feeling further reinforced by Yixing’s tales of the streets. He yearned to be out there, to be right alongside cats like Minseok, who by far, Lu Han decided long ago, was probably the greatest cat that had ever cat-ed. EVER.

“Hey, at least you never have to deal with the rain. Minseok hates the rain,” Yixing attempted to cheer his friend up.

Lu Han let out a small purr at the encouraging words. Still it was depressing – he didn’t even have the option to be in the rain. “What else has been going on in the neighborhood?” Lu Han changed the subject away from cats-with-more-exciting-lives.

“Same old. Minho is still chasing after Junmyeon, but the poor little thing is terrified of him. Chanyeol started a mini war with the east side squirrels over a lucrative tree, which come to find out he only wanted because Jongdae thinks the nuts taste better. I mean seriously, how does an opossum even eat nuts? Um, let’s see, what else has been going on.” Yixing looked thoughtful.

Lu Han’s tail thumped against the carpeting, a byproduct of a sudden movement that caught his eye. It was another bird approaching (and he couldn’t help it, his tail liked when things moved around outside).

“Hey, baby cakes!” a familiar voice squawked.

Yixing immediately tensed, his neck shooting up. “I have to go,” he blurted out, sounding equal parts terrified and angry. He flew off of his window perch in a blur, leaving Lu Han to entertain the newcomer.

Zhi Xiang landed on the window sill with a thud, his wing hitting against the screen. “Why does he keep doing that!” he whined, staring longingly after Yixing.

“He’s afraid of pigeons, you know that,” Lu Han reminded the pigeon for the umpteenth time.

“He _is_ a pigeon!” Zhi Xiang sighed. “A hot one at that.”

Lu Han yawned. A nap in the sun was preferable to hearing Zhi Xiang gush about his friend. He had enough of that for a lifetime, the older pigeon never stopped talking about the younger, talking Lu Han’s ear off whenever he caught him near the window.

“Hey, you can’t be tired. I have news for you,” Zhi Xiang hopped closer.

“News?” Lu Han fought to keep his eyes open. The sun was so nice, his carpeted perch was nice.

“I found a way to break you out if you’re still interested,” Zhi Xiang cooed. “But you need to help me too.”

Lu Han was instantly awake. “Of course I’m interested! I’do anything!” He could be free! He could meet Minseok! He could...do whatever commoner non-royal cats did (honestly he had no idea).

Zhi Xiang smiled. “Good, then let’s make a deal.”

 

 

Minseok yawned. It was his least favorite part of the day –– the sun was beginning to set, his favorite nap spot was losing its warmth. He reluctantly sat up and stretched, letting out another wide yawn.

“About time you got up.” Minseok blinked sleepily, glancing towards the sound of the voice. Standing before him was Sehun, a fluffy raccoon with an enormous attitude.

There was another reason this time of day was his least favorite. It was the time that everyone in the neighborhood was awake, the night dwellers waking up and those who preferred the day winding down their business. The neighborhood was so noisy at dusk.

“Sehun, something wrong?” Minseok asked between another yawn.

He was lying on the warm concrete step outside an empty human dwelling. He remembered it once had a human that made food living in it, but that was when Minseok was a kitten. Now it was empty like a lot of the buildings in the neighborhood. It also happened to be the perfect place to nap.

“Yeah, word on the street is something is going down tonight,” Sehun drawled. “Something big.”

Minseok licked his paw and wiped it behind his ear. He hated when his fur was mussed up. “Who’s involved?” he asked.

“I heard a rumor Zhi Xiang’s planning something.”

Minseok knew the pigeon well, he wasn’t particularly foolish unless it involved Yixing. “Sounds like much ado about nothing.”

“Much what about what?” Sehun blinked.

“Don’t worry about it. It’s just a rumor,” Minseok translated. “Go spend time with Baekhyun and stop worrying.”

The raccoon looked away, Minseok had hit a nerve. He was bashful whenever his relationship with the feisty skunk was hinted at “Why would I spend time with Baekhyun?”

“Because you’re in love with him,” Minseok replied matter-of-factly.

“No, I’m not!” Sehun protested.

“Sure, whatever you want to believe. Now go, I need to find dinner.”

Sehun gave Minseok a dirty look before he scampered in the direction of the park and the setting sun.

 

 

 

“So help me I will spray you!” Baekhyun shouted at the noisy opossum, ready to let loose his greatest weapon.

Jongdae laughed in the face of danger. “I live in a sewer, why would I care if you spray me?”

“Yeah, he lives in a sewer. Nice try Baek but you lose,” Chanyeol, a hyperactive squirrel who happened to be Jongdae’s significant other, chimed in.

Baekhyun narrowed his eyes at the pair. They had started the evening with a friendly game of nut billiards, which became not so friendly when Jongdae and Chanyeol blatantly cheated. “Fine. I’m going to leave then.”

“Fine,” Jongdae replied.

“Go.” Chanyeol gestured with his tail.

“I am. I’m going,” Baekhyun said firmly though he remained rooted to the spot.

“Great. Bye,” Jongdae held his head high - well, as high as an opossum can.

“See you,” Chanyeol mimicked.

“Yeah, leaving now.” Baekhyun still didn’t move. Hey, it was hard to find people to play nut billiards with.

An awkward silence hung in the air. “Want to play another round?” Jongdae asked.

“Yeah, sure,” Baekhyun readily agreed, letting bygones be bygones. While lining up to play Baekhyun spotted a familiar ambling silhouette across the park. He was seconds from shouting out for Sehun when he saw the small rabbit approach the raccoon, causing him to hold his tongue.

Chanyeol drew his attention back to the game. The next time Baekhyun looked over the raccoon and rabbit were headed in the opposite direction.

 

 

 

 

“I’m sorry to ask you to do this again,” Junmyeon apologized. He hopped next to Sehun, regretting that he was so weak he had to bother his friend once again.

“It’s not a problem, really. Plus there’s something I want to talk to you about.” Sehun purposely slowed his pace so he didn’t get ahead of his tiny rabbit friend.

Junmyeon appreciated Sehun’s consideration for his smaller size. He was a good raccoon, even if he could be a brat sometimes. “What’s on your mind?”

“So….have you ever wanted something that might be...weird. I mean, my friend asked me this,” Sehun said quickly. “Asking for a friend.”

They crossed street in front of the park as quickly as they could, mindful of the strange metallic animals that the humans always pushed down them.

When they got to the other side, Junmyeon answered Sehun’s question in short bursts, busy catching his breath “I don’t think I’ve wanted anything” Gasp. “Weird. What is weird, who defines it?” Junmyeon philosophized.

“It’s just – would it make me, I mean _my friend_ , a pervert if say he wanted to be sprayed by a skunk? Hypothetically. For my friend.” Sehun looked way.

They entered the long alleyway that ran along the backs of the townhouses, the area was dark, the sun long gone.

“Sehun, your friend isn’t a pervert for liking what he likes,” Junmyeon answered carefully.

The raccoon beside him instantly brightened. “Really? I...thank you.”

Junmyeon smiled at his friend, happy he could ease his worries. It was the least he could do after all. Sehun never said no to him when he asked the raccoon to accompany him during the arduous trek, sticking by his side while he faced his biggest fear time and time again.

“Jongin don’t you dare–!” Sehun suddenly stopped, shouting towards an overturned garbage can.

Junmyeon froze, eyes going wide. _Stay still and you become invisible_ , he repeated over and over. He spotted the large white rat, Jongin, scurrying from behind the garbage can, heading towards the yard of Junmyeon’s enemy.

_Be still. Become one with your surroundings. No one can see you. Embrace the way of the rabbit._

“I will feed you to Minseok if you dare to tell Minho! Jongin, you you––” Sehun was furiously yelled after the rat. Jongin, predictably, could care less. He knew if he told Minho that Junmyeon was near the dog would give him something to eat. Rats were very greedy creatures after all. “Junmyeon, come on, we should hurry,” Sehun said in defeat.

_Become one with your surroundings. No one can see you._

 “Junmyeon!” Sehun shouted.

_I am invisible. I am one with nature._

“Junmyeon we have to hurry!” Sehun nudged the frozen rabbit with his nose. It was enough to snap Junmyeon out of his rabbit zen zone.

Now fully visible the grave nature of the situation occurred to him. Junmyeon squeaked in alarm and began hopping down the alley as fast as he could. He hated it, the closer he got the smell was overpowering. _Minho, the animal he feared most._

Sehun rushed to put himself between Junmyeon and the upcoming chain link fence, knowing the sight of the large lumbering dog sent Junmyeon into a panic. As they neared it began, the long, never-ending howl.

“Junmyeon? Junmyeon is it really you? I love you. I love you so much. Junmyeon I am so happy you are here. I’m still sorry I tried to eat you when you were a baby but I didn’t know what you were and if I don’t know I have to put the thing in my mouth to find out and you are so cute please love me. Junmyeon you are so great. Did you know you are great? Look I dug you this hole. Junmyeon please talk to me. Junmyeon I love you so much.” Minho, the large golden retriever, ran alongside the fence, talking nonstop, his tail wagging violently behind him.

Junmyeon hopped faster, fear coursing through him. Flashes of memory made it worse, of the time he was small and helpless, asleep in his mother’s home. A large wet nose had hit him and then he was in somethings mouth, teeth caging him in. A few seconds later he was spat onto the ground, alone, his sense of security shattered.

He rushed past the fence, Sehun blocking his view of the large golden dog. They only slowed once they could no longer hear the love confessions from Minho.

“Thank you, again,” Junmyeon said through heavy breaths. They were at the end of the alley now, the danger passed.

“No problem. Thanks for listening to my question. Friend’s question I mean.”

“Goodnight,” Junmyeon parted ways with the large raccoon, realizing he had probably already taken him away from some time with Baekhyun. He didn’t even realize until he was half a block away that he had forgotten to tell Sehun where he was going. Zhi Xiang had summoned him, why he wasn’t sure. Sehun usually talked to everyone so Junmyeon had hoped he would have some information.

“I suppose I will find out what he wants in a minute,” Junmyeon sighed, hopping towards the pigeons roost.

 

 

 

Kyungsoo turned off the running water. He grabbed for the dishtowel that sat on the kitchen counter, drying his hands as he walked to the back door. His dog, Minho, had launched into a barking fit. Kyungsoo tried to be a good neighbor, considerate of others schedules. He knew that the lady next door went to bed early, she wouldn’t appreciate Minho’s howls at this time of night.

Kyungsoo called for his dog, the golden retriever instantly going silent and running for the back door.

“You sure like to talk, buddy,” Kyungsoo sighed as the dog ran past him into the house. 

Minho ran to the living room, Kyungsoo trailing after him, deciding he had enough of dishes for one night. The dog plopped down on the floor looking utterly depressed.

“Cheer up, at least you don’t have to pay bills,” Kyungsoo said dryly, reaching for the remote control.

He stopped mid-reach when he spotted his across the street neighbor out the window. Kyungsoo felt his cheeks grow warm at the mere sight of the man. “At least you don’t have to have a crush on the supermodel artist’s across the way,” he muttered.

He had noticed him the first day he moved in, the tall man with blonde hair and legs that went on forever. He was doomed from the first glance. He still didn’t know his name - at first he was “cat guy” since his white cat was always in the window. Now he was “artist guy” since Kyungsoo had realized he painted. He wondered what his real name was but was too afraid to ever talk to him. He was not a people person, not even a little.

Kyungsoo sighed wistfully at his situation. “We both have it bad, huh,” he muttered, suddenly just as depressed as his dog.

 

 

 

Lu Han paced nervously. His human servant had went through the going-somewhere-for-hours door, an unusual occurrence at this hour. Zhi Xiang should be stopping by soon and it was extremely important that Lu Han’s human servant was home – it was a paramount part of the plan.

Thankfully it wasn’t long before the human came back, toting a bag of human food.

Soon, Lu Han thought as he rubbed against his servant’s leg, saying his final goodbyes. Soon I will be free.

 

 

 

“If you aren’t nice to others, they will not be nice to you,” Minseok said firmly, trying to make eye contact with all of the kittens who had congregated in the alley.

“But what if someone is mean to you before you are mean to them, then what?” One of the kittens, a scraggly orange tabby by the name of Mark, asked.

“You be nice to them. Treat others how you would like to be treated.” Minseok sat on an overturned orange crate, a group of street kittens hanging on his every word. It was important to impart wisdom to the kittens who had no one, who had nothing but the streets. Minseok wished someone had done that to him way back when - that he had someone instead of growing up alone. He had started lecturing the street kittens a few years back, mentoring most of the young cats who lived in the neighborhood. It was how he gave back, how he built unity in the hectic place he called home.

“Uncle Minseok, aren’t birds supposed to be in bed now?” Irene, a black kitten asked.

“Huh?” Minseok followed where the kitten was staring, moving his ears forward to listen. At the end of the alley, illuminated by the streetlight, he spotted Zhi Xiang flying along, a small rabbit hopping a few paces behind. Strange. The memory of what Sehun had told him flooded back.

“Yes, they should. Now time to go to bed, kids.” Minseok shooed the kittens away, some of them meowing in complaint. He ignored them in favor of slinking down the alleyway, curious what the pigeon could be up to.

He reached the end of the alley and turned the corner to the sidewalk. They were gone. He looked both ways up and across the street but there was no sight of the rabbit or the pigeon, only a few humans mulling about, walking with those strange wire things in their ears.

Dread pooled in Minseok’s gut. Could Sehun have been right? Was something big about to go down? He sat down and waited, watching, hoping that whatever the pigeon was up to it wouldn’t end in chaos.

 

 

 

Junmyeon took the stairs as quickly as he could, which wasn’t very quick at all. It was hard to jump the right way, to reach one of the steps and then the other without slipping. “Are you sure that this will work?” he asked Zhi Xiang for the tenth time.

“Yep. It’s foolproof,” Zhi Xiang reassured him.

Junmyeon had hesitated when Zhi Xiang had asked for his help. What had made him give in was the promise of a carrot which “the human will surely give you when he thinks you are hurt.”

Apparently Zhi Xiang needed something in this human’s house and Junmyeon was going to be the distraction, the bait for the human to open the door and let the bird in. Junmyeon would presumably play the part of an injured rabbit, go inside, get a carrot, and then be on his merry way a few minutes after Zhi Xiang had retrieved his target and flown out of the human dwelling. Or so Zhi Xiang said. Junmyeon trusted him, figuring a pigeon saw a lot more than a rabbit did. Also there were carrots involved.

When Junmyeon reached the large white door of the human’s abode he quickly realized the plan wasn’t going to work the way Zhi Xiang said. For one, the pigeon backed off when he had said he would be only a few feet away. Instead of perching nearby he stayed near the doorway to the stairs, leaving Junmyeon to stand in the hallway alone.

To top off the poor planning, Junmyeon had to whine for almost four minutes before he heard footsteps. The door did open, but instead of a tasty carrot Junmyeon found a tall human with blonde hair staring down at him, looking utterly confused.

“How in the world did you get in here?” the man asked. Junmyeon held up his paw, trying to act like it was hurting him.

“Are you sick, little guy?” What happened next was definitely not part of the plan.

The human lifted Junmyeon up in his large hands. While Junmyeon was being manhandled (literally) a streak of white fur rushed out the open door. The human didn’t seem to notice and shut the door, carrying Junmyeon into his house. Zhi Xiang never came in, something got out and ten minutes later, still no carrot in sight, Junmyeon realized he had made a very bad deal.

 

 

 

Minseok’s hackles raised when the white blur darted from the building, blindly careening into the road and straight towards him. He didn’t realize what the creature was until he had it pinned to the ground, his teeth keeping it in place with a hold on its neck.

“Don’t kill me!” the animal screeched.

A cat. It was a cat. A cat that smelled like humans and fruit and the old drug store that used to be on the corner. “Who are you?” Minseok hissed. He wasn’t about to let a potentially dangerous cat into the neighborhood, especially with the kittens so close.

“I-I-” the cat stuttered, terrified.

Minseok loosened his grip on the cat’s neck. He removed his mouth but kept one paw on the feline, pushing it down into the pavement.

“Minseok, let him go, he’s okay.” Zhi Xiang was perched on the light post near the alley, watching the two cats.

“Wait, you’re Minseok!? T _he Minseok_?!” The cat gasped.

Minseok gave the pigeon a dirty look but moved away, sitting back. It gave him an opportunity to look at the newcomer. Long, clean white fur. Big blue eyes. He was pretty. “Yeah. And who are you?”

“L-Lu Han. Oh wow, I can’t believe it’s you,” the cat purred.

Minseok eyed him up. How had this animal heard of him?

Lu Han blurted out the answer like he could read Minseok’s mind. “Yixing’s told me all about you and wow you are so nice looking. Can I clean you?” Lu Han asked excitedly.

“No,” Minseok answered firmly.

“I’ll let you clean me,” Lu Han offered.

“Still no. “Minseok looked up at the pigeon. “Where’s Junmyeon?”

“No clue,” Zhi Xiang answered.

Minseok considered his words. Something felt off. “Why is Lu Han here?”

“He just moved here,” Zhi Xiang answered without missing a beat. “Now if you’ll excuse me, it is well past my bedtime.” The pigeon flew off before Minseok could ask him another question.

Minseok turned to the newbie, narrowing his eyes at the eager feline. “You’re an inside cat, aren’t you? Did you escape?”

“Maybe...” Lu Han answered weakly.

“The streets are tough, are you sure you want to be out here?” Minseok warned.

“Yes! I’ve wanted to meet you forever, you have no idea how much I lov-” Lu Han stopped himself mid-gush. “I’ll be fine.”

Minseok regarded the cat for a few more seconds before he turned around and slinked down the alley. Lu Han followed after him, repeating his desire to clean him. “I lick really well.”

“I’m sure you do, but no.”

“I’m royalty, my tongue is a royal tongue and I really want to lick you with it.”

“Don’t care.”

“Minseok, can we cuddle?”

“Maybe.”

Lu Han purred so loudly it made Minseok smile. Such an odd creature.

He told himself he was just being nice letting Lu Han follow him to his second favorite sleeping place, the bed of grass that grew in the yard of an old townhouse. He told himself he was watching out for the new guy when he finally gave in and let the white cat cuddle alongside him. He told himself he was doing the right thing when he let Lu Han lick him clean (and wow, he wasn’t kidding about his tongue).

He told himself he was most definitely not a bit in love when Lu Han fell asleep next to him and it felt like the most perfect moment in all of his life. Love at first cat fight was a myth, he reminded himself, all a myth.

 

 

 

Lu Han woke up first, his head nestled into he grey cat’s fur. He ached from sleeping outdoors but despite his physical pain he was in a terrific mental state. He had done it! He was free, ready to get in crazy adventures with Minseok, the greatest most handsomest bestest cat ever. And he had even cleaned him and slept next to him and, and, and...Lu Han purred. Minseok was really quite nice looking, even if he was a little rough around the edges and positively tiny considering Lu Han’s previous mental image of him.

He couldn’t believe how lucky he was so far. He was certain he just had to wait for Minseok to wake up and they would be off on some whacky, amazing journey.

“Hey, where’s my fur?”

Lu Han looked up to the fire escape on the back of the town home, spotting the familiar form of one Zhi Xiang perched on the railing. Oh right, he thought, the deal.

“How am I supposed to cut my win fur?” Lu Han asked quietly, mindful of the fact Minseok was still asleep.

“How do you usually cut it?” Zhi Xiang shot back. “Do it that way.”

“I don’t,” Lu Han admitted. He never cut his fur and his human servant’s didn’t dare do it either. It was, in retrospect, rather foolish to make such a bargain. Freedom for some of his precious fur. He had no way to see the deal through. “I only lick away the stragglers.”

Zhi Xiang narrowed his eyes at the fluffy white cat. “Then why did you promise me you could give me some fur?”

“I was desperate!” Lu Han said much too loudly, causing Minseok to stir beside him.

The grey cat yawned and opened his eyes. “What’s going on? What about fur?”

Lu Han tensed. He really didn’t want to have to explain the situation to his hero / love of his life / the best cat ever to cat.

It turned out he didn’t have to explain, Zhi Xiang did it for it. “I made a deal to help Lu Han escape if he gave me some fur, turns out this cat cant’ give me any.”

“Why do you need fur?” Minseok sat up, blinking sleepily.

“Because Yixing isn’t afraid of fur like he is pigeons,” Zhi Xiang answered confidently. “He won’t run away if he can’t tell I’m a pigeon.”

Lu Han looked sheepish. “I didn’t think about how to do it when I agreed to it.”

“Easy, just rip it out,” Minseok suggested, stretching out his front paws and then arching his back, getting the kinks out from a few hours of sleep.

“Rip it out?!” Lu Han meowed, alarmed by the idea. Ripping fur out would hurt...it would feel bad...he didn’t like to feel bad. Feeling bad was not one of his hobbies and/or interests.

“Yeah. I can do it for you if you’re scared,” Minseok offered.

“I’m not scared,” Lu Han replied. He was scared. Terrified actually.

“Okay, then hold still.” Minseok approached slowly.

Lu Han closed his eyes and began to shiver. He hated pain. His human servants always made sure he never felt it (except those few times they took him to the human servant center where he was stabbed with little metal things and told he was pretty).

“One, two, three,” Minseok counted.

Lu Han screamed when he felt his fur being tugged out. His eyes flew open just in time to see Minseok with a mouthful of white fur. He looked at his back in a panic. There was a patch with a little less fur staring back at him. “My precious fur,” he whined.

“Hey, I said the streets aren’t kind. A deal is a deal,” Zhi Xiang remarked, flying down to scoop up the clump of white fur.

Lu Han felt like crying. Who was he to think he could survive in this harsh place? He hadn’t even seen a carpeted tree in the entire time he had been outdoors. “There probably aren’t any pillows either,” he whispered, horrified at his new reality.

 

 

 

Sehun yawned. He was up too late but he kind of had to be. It was the only way he had time to spend with Baekhyun, who was only awake during dusk and dawn. The sun was rising and Baekhyun was plodding through the park, talking animatedly about the prior night’s game with Chanyeol and Jongdae.

Sehun half-listened, too tired to really follow along.

“Hey, are you even listening?” Baekhyun stopped walking.

Sehun didn’t have time to answer. The small skunk landed a bite onto his behind, sending the raccoon howling and then chasing him, bent on retaliation.

“I’m going to bite your ass so hard when I catch you!” Sehun shouted, feeling very awake all of a sudden. It was part of what he liked about Baekhyun. He was playful. He was cute. He had a dirty mind and a dirtier defense system.

Thirty feet away, in the largest oak tree in the park, a squirrel and a pigeon watched the scene play out

“I think they’re both perverts,” Chanyeol remarked, watching the skunk and raccoon in between nibbling on his morning nut.

“They are,” Yixing agreed. The squirrel and the pigeon were roommates of sorts, both occupying the same tree. Yixing didn’t mind it because he always had someone to talk to. Chanyeol didn’t mind it because, well, he rarely minded anything unless it involved his food supply or Jongdae.

“Hey Yixing, do you ever get lonely?” Chanyeol inquired, clearly hinting at something.

“Sometimes,” Yixing admitted. His mind went to the one animal he liked, the one he really liked...the one he could never be with because of his own fears.

“I hope you find someone soon,” Chanyeol said quietly. “You’re such a nice pigeo-”

Yixing’s eyes went wide at the word.

“Nice _bird_!” Chanyeol corrected himself, letting Yixing breathe a little easier. “Hey, why are you afraid of...you know? You never roost with the other um, things.”

Yixing was quiet for a few seconds. When he answered he did so in a low voice. “I’m not afraid. I just...it wouldn’t be good if I was with the others. I pretend to be afraid so they leave me alone, so it’s better for them.”

“Whatdya mean?”

“Chanyeol, can I trust you?” Yixing was hesitating.

“Of course! You know I never let anyone touch my nuts but I let you so clearly I like you,” Chanyeol rambled.

“I have a past. I wasn’t always a street pigeon.” Yixing stared off into the distance. “I used to carry messages, top secret stuff mostly. Humans trained me. I would fly upstate and back. I left that life a few years ago, changed my name, but I can’t be sure the others aren’t after me.”

“Wow. So you were a special ops pigeon?” Chanyeol’s mouth hung open.

“We are called passenger pigeons. Top of the top. Elite stuff,” Yixing looked at Chanyeol. “I once had to deliver a message to some human on a boat with fish. I never saw him again.”

“Crazy.”

“Don’t tell anyone, please,” Yixing begged. “I trust you.”

Chanyeol fumbled with the nut in his tiny squirrel hands. “Thank you Yixing, that means a lot.”

 

 

 

Minho pranced towards the door, tail wagging a mile a minute. It was his favorite time of before his human left. He was going to take his human for a walk! Human walks were the best!

He managed to stifle his enthusiasm for the few seconds it took his human to put the human guiding rope around his neck. He knew the next part by heart! The door would open, he would step out into the fresh morning air, and then he would walk his human around the block and show him off. It was great!

He guided his human down the front stoop before he heard it and stopped. It was a whimper, the tiniest of noises. He froze, ears perking up. He would recognize that whimper anywhere...Junmyeon! It was the love of his life in some sort of distress! Minho knew he was an enthusiastic sort but he really did try to think his actions through at least a quarter of the time. But this, this was not a time to think.

He dragged his human towards the noise. He needed to help his beloved, human walking be damned.

“Minho, what are you doing?!” his human yelled out.

Minho bolted across the street, following the noise to the stoop of the house directly across from his own. He blindly rushed towards the door to the building, not caring that another human was walking out. He had to save Junmyeon. He had to save his love, even if it was one-sided.

 

 

 

 

Kyungsoo struggled to gain control of the apparently possessed golden retriever. Minho was a strong dog, he dragged Kyungsoo across the road with ease (thankfully there was little traffic at this time of day). He yanked on the leash, trying and failing to stop his dog from charging towards...towards…

A flurry of papers shot into the air, landing around the tall man that Minho collided with. The man landed on his ass with a thud.

Kyungsoo was mortified. He grabbed for Minho, managing to get a hold on the dog. “I’m terribly sorry, I don’t know what’s gotten into my dog.” He held the dog in place despite the canine’s struggles.

“It’s fine.” Minho’s victim struggled to sit up.

Kyungsoo finally got a look at who it was and his mortification increased tenfold. It was hot artist guy. Minho had knocked over hot artist guy!!

“I-you- let…” Kyungsoo tried to think of what to do. Papers were still scattered, some started to blow away in the wind. Minho was still struggling, being an absolutely terrible dog. It was only right that he help the man pick up the papers since it was his dog that had made him drop them, but he couldn’t let go of Minho at the moment. It was a terrible situation.

“I need to take my dog home, I’ll be right back and help you pick this up. I’m so, so sorry.” Kyungsoo picked up the heavy dog, knowing he wouldn’t get him home any other way. He rushed back across the street and somehow managed to get Minho back in the house successfully. He darted back to the mess his dog had caused, finding hot artist guy standing and dusting dirt off his jeans.

“I have no idea why he did that. I am so sorry, he is usually much better behaved.” Kyungsoo began picking up the papers but paused when he realized what they were.

_Missing Cat_

_Reward Offered_

_Answers to the names: Lu Han, Fluffy McFlufferson, PrettyPretty, Who’s a pretty boy_

 

“Your cat is missing?” Kyungsoo looked up at the man, notching his eyes were rimmed with red. He had been crying.

The man cleared his throat. “Yeah. He got out last night.”

Kyungsoo imagined how it would feel if Minho ran away. It would be absolutely terrible. “I’ll help you hang these, if you don’t mind.”

“I would appreciate that…”

“My name is Kyungsoo. I live over there.” He pointed towards his townhouse. He could feel his cheeks growing red. Was he really talking to hot artist cat guy because his dog had knocked him down?

“I’m Yifan. Thank you Kyungsoo, I really appreciate it.” Yifan started to pick up the papers, working alongside Kyungsoo. “That cat means the world to me, he’s my baby. I can’t imagine life without him.”

“I completely understand.” Kyungsoo would feel the same.

“It’s weird, you know. I found an injured rabbit last night and somewhere along the line my cat ran away.” Yifan began shuffling and straightening the fliers. “A rabbit was in my building.”

“Really?” Kyungsoo found it very odd.

“Yeah. I was going to take him to the vet but now he seems fine.” Yifan sighed,  “Hopefully Lu Han is okay too.”

Kyungsoo hoped the same.

 

 

 

 

“I can’t believe you tore my fur out,” Lu Han whined.

“I tore a tiny bit off, it couldn’t have hurt that much,” Minseok rolled his eyes.

“B-but that is the most hair anyone has torn off me _ever_ ,” Lu Han cried.

Minseok had found Lu Han oddly endearing the night before. Truthfully he was a little bit in love with the cat for mysterious reasons. But the whining...that was really getting to him.

They were walking down one of the alleys, headed to find some breakfast. Minseok stopped walking, needing to have talk with his new friend. “Listen, if you keep whining I’m not going to hang out with you anymore.”

Lu Han’s ears went back. “I’ll stop, I promise!”

“Do you regret coming out here?” Minseok asked, curious if Lu Han had finally realized his mistake.

“No,” Lu Han answered firmly. “I mean, it may not be as nice out here as it is with my human servants but you’re out here.”

Minseok really could not comprehend Lu Han’s fascination with him. “So are a lot of other cats. And there are plenty of cats that would love to live inside. There isn’t anything special about me.”

“Don’t say that!” Lu Han protested. “You’re very special. You’re handsome and beautiful and fun to lick and oh wow you cuddle well. You cat really well and I love you and why do we have to be from such different worlds?”

Minseok swallowed. That was the crux of the problem. They were from two different worlds. Two incompatible worlds. He was from the mean streets, Lu Han was from the inside. Minseok didn’t even know what the inside was like and Lu Han clearly had no idea what to do on the outside. They were strangers no matter what they felt towards each other. No matter how good the cuddling was. “You shouldn’t love me.”

“Saying that only makes me want to love you more,” Lu Han responded, purring softly.

“You have to go back inside. We both know you can’t live out here forever.”

“I’ll live out here as long as you are here,” Lu Han vowed. “Even if it is forever. Minseok, do you love me? Say you love me.”

Minseok looked way. “What is love, Lu Han? How do you know?” He felt a tickle in his throat, much like when he was going to cough up a hairball.

“Would you let another cat clean you now that I’ve cleaned you?” Lu Han inquired. “Be honest.”

Minseok thought about it. What was happening to him? Suddenly the idea of another cat cleaning him seemed wrong. But he was used to being alone, why had things changed so suddenly? Was Lu Han’s tongue really that great? “I...does that mean I love you?”

Lu Han nodded.

“Then I guess I do,” Minseok admitted with a soft meow. He had a feeling life here on out would only become more complicated.

 

 

 

Yixing spotted the strange bird across the park. He was about to fly off to see Lu Han when the sight caught his eye. It was a furry bird, unlike any he had ever seen before.  How strange. A bird in disguise…a bird that was trying to throw everyone off.

“They’ve come for me,” he whispered. It was time, the passenger pigeons had finally found him.

He had thought about this situation time and time again, how he would handle it, what he would do. Fly away? No, flying without a message tied to his leg was cowardly. He would stay and fight. He braced himself on the branch and waited as the fur clad bird approached.

When the strange fluffy white bird landed he reacted, beak shoved forward, ready to peck. “I knew you’d find me eventually but I won’t go down without a fight!” He pecked the furry bird a few times before it cried out in an oddly familiar voice.

“I thought you only hated pigoens!” Zhi Xiang cried.

Yixing stepped back, confused. “Zhi Xiang?”

“Sure, I’ve loved you forever and yeah maybe I’m annoying but I thought if I wasn’t a pigeon anymore you would at least give me a chance. I know I’m not the best guy out there, hell Bob has a way bigger roost but I try. Yixing, I try and I love you. I love you so much I’m dressed in cat fur.”

Yixing had no idea what to do so he just stared at the other bird.

“Wait, did you say you knew I’d find you? You weren’t talking about me, were you? Yixing…who is trying to find you?!”

“I need to go,” Yixing let panic set in. He took off, flying as far away as he could manage –– which happened to be the roof of the nearby convenience store.

 

 

“It’s Jongin! Its’ Jongin!” Chanyeol chirped to no one in particular. He scurried down the trunk of his tree, curious what brought the rat to the park. He usually stayed in the alleyway. “Jongin! Jongin! Want to see my nuts?!”

Jongin shook his little rat snout. “No. I’m here on business. Meeting tonight, Minho’s place. Spread the word.”

Chanyeol frowned. “You really don’t want to see my nuts?”

“No. Just…Chanyeol, please tell everyone. There’s a problem in the neighborhood we need to discuss,” Jongin said sternly.

“Oh, okay. Problems got it!” Chanyeol repeated, not entirely getting it.

 

 

 

 

“And that is the first fight I was in,” Minseok finished the story, recalling his rough and tumble younger days.

“Wow. You’ve led an exciting life.” Lu Han looked a bit starry eyed, hanging on Minseok’s every word.

“My life isn’t exciting.” Minseok purred loudly, snuggling closer to Lu Han. “It’s a hard life. I kind of wish I lived your life to be honest.”

“My life isn’t good,” Lu Han replied.

“But you’re safe, you’re comfortable,” Minseok countered. “A lot of cats would love to have that.”

“But I’m alone. All alone,” Lu Han said sadly. “My human servants clearly fear my station in life too much to do anything but snuggle me now and then. It isn’t the same as having real friends. It isn’t the same. They _have_ to love me.”

Minseok considered his words. Lu Han had told him about spending all day looking out the window (except for when his owner was carrying him around and giving him kisses or when he fell asleep on the bed or when he was asleep in that nice spot by the fake plant). The life honestly didn’t seem that bad to Minseok, it seemed nice even. Comfortable. Safe. And then something occurred to him, something he had forgotten to ask. “Lu Han, did you ever see me when you were looking out the window?”

“No. I never looked down, it seemed scary,” Lu Han answered. “Plus I fell asleep a lot. The sun is so warm and nice.”

Minseok had a hard time feeling sorry for Lu Han’s previous life. In fact he was quite envious.

 

 

Sehun plodded down the alley, worry coursing through him. Junmyeon hadn’t been by and after asking around at the park no one had seen him since the night before. Minho was asking everyone to gather for a meeting and Sehun feared the worst...that something had happened to his friend. On his way to the meeting he spotted fliers plastered to buildings. Wanted posters. There was a fugitive in the neighborhood.

“Babe, it’ll be okay, I promise,” Baekhyun tried to reassure him.

It was dusk, the time when the majority of animals were awake. They began filtering down the alley, towards Minho’s yard, sporting different levels of anxious expressions. Whenever a meeting like this was called it was usually not a good thing regardless of who called it. It was especially ominous that Minho, a happy-go-lucky dog, had asked everyone to get together.

Sehun stood nervously near the fence, not bothering to make small talk with Jongdae or Jongin. Minho paced nervously in the yard, his tail unusually still.

“Did you guys see the wanted posters?” Sehun heard Jongdae say. “Looks like we have a fugitive around here.”

“It’s that cat from the human place,” Chanyeol rattled off. “The one Yixing talks to.”

“Wonder what he did to have his picture hanging up all over the neighborhood,” Jongdae mused.

A few minutes later the fugitive cat arrived, slinking into the meeting area at Minseok’s side, the two glued to each other. They earned curious looks from most of those gathered. Since when did Minseok get that close to anyone?

“You?! It is your fault! You awful cat you put my Junmyeon in danger. I am very mad. Very, very mad. So mad. Why did you do it? I hate you. You are a bad cat!” Minho barked as soon as he saw the fluffy white feline.

Sehun was even more surprised to see Minseok suddenly place himself between the dog and the white cat (even if the dog was securely fenced the gesture was a strange one).

“What is he going on about?” Sehun asked loudly. “What happened to Junmyeon and who are you?”

“The humans took Junmyeon because this fugitive here is in the neighborhood. He’s being held hostage for this no good cat. You’re a bad cat. I hate you. I really hate you. I don’t hate many people but I hate you. Why are you so bad? I hate you,” Minho rambled.

“Hostage?” the white cat meowed. “I don’t understand. Who is Junmyeon?”

“I think I have an idea of what is going on.” Minseok frowned, recalling what he had witnessed the night before. “Is Zhi Xiang here?”

Like magic the very pigeon that Minseok was thinking of appeared, landing on the nearby electrical wire. A few strands of white fur were still stuck to him, giving him a crazy appearance.

“What did you do with Junmyeon? I’ll eat you. I promise I’ll eat you. You know I love him so much and I will eat you if he gets hurt!” Minho barked. “I know he was with you last. And now there’s a wanted cat. I get it. I hate you!”

“Wait, he’s not back yet?” Zhi Xiang asked, looking confused.

“I’m going to eat you!” Minho barked louder.

“Come clean, what did you do?” Minseok gave the pigeon a stern look.

“I-we-” the pigeon looked at Lu Han. “He was supposed to be the diversion so Lu Han could escape. Humans love tiny things like Junmyeon!  I thought the human would let him go right away. I didn’t know he would keep him!”

“Definitely going to eat you now!”

“Can I watch if you eat him?” Jongdae chimed in.

“I want to watch too,” Chanyeol added.

“That cat is on wanted posters all over the neighborhood. His human is holding Junmyeon hostage, I think that the solution to this problem is easy to figure out,” Jongdae fanned the flames.

“Everyone, calm down!” Lu Han spoke up, earning a mixture of glares and curious stares. “My human servant would never do anything bad to him! It must be a mistake. I’m not wanted...I ...”

“Take a look at any telephone pole on the block. Your picture is everywhere. Can’t miss it. You have a pink bow on the top of your head,” Baekhyun tried to set the cat straight.

Lu Han was afraid to go look but Minseok wasn’t. “Hold on.” He ran down the alley, leaving Minho to continue yelling at the pigeon and cat in turn.

Minseok returned with a grim look on his face. “It’s true. They’re everywhere.”

Sehun glared at the cat. His friend was in danger and this fluffy pretty feline was to blame. “You are going to figure out how to rescue Junmyeon or I will help Minho eat you.”

“I love it when you’re angry,” Baekhyun whispered. “Makes me want to spray you.”

Sehun swallowed, the mention of his secret desire forcing his mind to go blank. Oh, he hadn’t been expecting that. Not at all.

“How are we supposed to get a human to give up a hostage?!” One of the opossums from a block away shouted.

“Humans aren’t nice,” one of the east side squirrels chimed in.

“Junmyeon’s doomed,” someone whispered from the back.

“I can get him out.” It was Yixing. He had landed during the argument, hanging at the back of the crowd.

“How?” Lu Han asked, hopeful.

“It’s time I told you all the truth.” The pigeon stared at Zhi Xiang as he spoke. “But first let’s get our bunny back.”

 

 

 

Lu Han had done it. He had created a mess for everyone all because he wanted to be free, to live a little...to find the cat he loved. The angry looks from the others was warranted, he was at fault. Yet he didn’t regret it. Leaving his human servant had allowed him to meet Minseok, the love of his life. For one day they were together, tumbling around, licking each other, and watching birds they didn’t know with thinly veiled disgust.  It was great.

And now he knew it was time to move on. The last thing he wanted was to cause Minseok trouble, which he had clearly done. One of his friends was gone and even though Lu Han knew that his human servant would never hurt him it had still caused an issue.

“Minseok, I think I need to go back,” Lu Han softly meowed. He had pulled Minseok aside, away from the others. Yixing was laying out a solid plan but Lu Han knew a way to make it even more foolproof.

“What?” Minseok turned to his...whatever Lu Han was to him. _Licking partner_? “Are you sure?”

“Yeah. I don’t want to cause trouble.” He also really missed his bed and that pile of sweaters his human servant left on the floor for him to sleep on. Also it was easier to see when his human servant put his precious fur into a pink ribbon. Still, he was sad to leave Minseok. “I love you but I don’t think we can be together.”

“Lu Han…I…” Minseok looked away. “I love you too.”

“Whenever I lick myself I’ll think of you,” Lu Han was almost in tears.

“Same,” Minseok agreed quietly.

It was devastating but Lu Han thought it was the right thing to do. “Our worlds are so different…”

“I know. I know.” Minseok was crying. “ Lu Han, if only…”

“If only what?” Lu Han asked, hoping against everything there was some way they could be together even if he knew it was impossible.

“Nothing, Lu Han. Nothing.”

Lu Han cleared his throat with a hack. Stepping forward he interrupted the planning. “I want to go back. Use me as bait.”

 

 

 

Minseok had never been this sad. He had found someone, his someone, and now they had to say goodbye. Somewhere deep down he knew it would end like this but the thought of being alone again...it ripped him in two.

He tried to ignore the goodbye that would arrive soon, focusing on spending their last moments together purring and licking each other’s ears (also watching the progress of the mission since that was kind of important too).

“There they go,” Minseok whispered, Lu Han’s tongue dragging against his forehead.

“Is that the army?” Lu Han whispered.

“Yeah, they’re the best according to Yixing.”

Across the street a line of cockroaches skittered up the building, led by their fearless general, one Zitao. Minseok could hear the cockroach barking orders, directing his troops.

“Once they secure the perimeter then the others can get to work,” Minseok explained. It was a risky plan but one they had to embark on. The cockroaches would surround the human abode, swarming if the human tried to hurt Junmyeon.

Lu Han would be the catalyst. After Sehun, with his claws, opened the door, Lu Han would run to his servant’s home and meow. Once his servant heard him and opened the door Minho would spring into action, rushing inside to rescue Junmyeon (jumping the fence to his yard was far too easy). The others would be waiting in the building to distract the human servant if he gave chase. Yixing would coo the signals from above, giving the orders, making sure the operation ran smoothly.

“I’ll never forget you, Minseok.” Lu Han purred as the first coo, the call to action, sounded in the night. “Never.”

 

 

Kyungsoo opened the back door and called for Minho. He was of the mind to go to bed. He had spent the day walking around the neighborhood helping Yifan hang posters and look for his cat, his legs were aching. It was unfortunate that it was such a sad thing that had finally gotten Kyungsoo to talk to the man, but he would take it. He hoped Yifan’s cat was okay but he couldn’t stop being happy that he finally knew his neighbor. He had gotten through the difficult part, introductions. Now, now he could actually talk to him.

“Time to come in, boy,” Kyungsoo called.

The usual sound of Minho’s dog tags jingling was absent. Squinting Kyungsoo glanced around. Minho was gone.

Panicked, he rushed outside to check the alley. When he didn’t spot his dog he raced around the block, spotting the golden retriever as he slipped inside of Yifan’s building. Kyungsoo could scarcely believe his eyes...was that a raccoon holding the door open as Minho and a fluffy white cat walked inside?!

“Yifan’s cat!” Kyungsoo yelled excitedly. He rushed towards the building, hoping to keep the animal inside and alert Yifan. The door banged shut as the Raccoon scurried off at his approach. And then the unexpected happened.

Kyungsoo hadn’t seen the small black and white animal until it was too late. He was sprayed head on by the skunk, the noxious fumes wafting over him. He cried out, rushing back from the angry animal. His scream was loud enough to reach Yifan through his open window.

“Kyungsoo?!” Yifan shouted down.

Kyungsoo could see Yifan’s face in the window, looking down at him in shock.

“Skunk!” Kyungsoo wailed, mortified for the second time that day. But wait, that wasn’t the important part. “I saw your cat go inside the building! Hurry, catch him! And my dog too!”

 

 

Junmyeon whimpered, cuddling against his carrot. He was stuck in a cage, given carrots and water in a tiny bowl. The human had said nice things to him when he wasn’t crying, but the human crying made Junmyeon cry and everything was just terrible. He was trapped and no one would rescue him. Ever. Never, ever.

He would no longer be able to rabbit. He would have to live in in this place with the crying human and the carrots and the tiny blanket and...Okay, so it could be worse but still. He wanted to go home. Hell, he even missed Minho at his point.

Speaking of Minho...a smell overcame Junmyeon, one that he recognized. He stilled. It was the dog. It was the terrible dog who tried to eat him when he was a baby. It was...it was….

The door to the human’s house opened and in came the golden monster, out went the human.

“Junmyeon, I’m going to rescue you. I’m going to save you my love. I love you. I really love you. I’ll eat anyone who hurts you. My love I will save you. My love wait for me. Oh look food on the counter. I mean, no, not now Minho, you’re a good boy. Junmyeon, I am coming! But wow that food smells great.”

“Minho! Minho, I’m right here!” Junmyeon shouted, no longer afraid. He wanted to be rescued and if his rescuer was the big golden monster so be it. He could secretly admit to himself that he had been dramatic about the dog in the past. He hadn’t eaten him, just scared him and while that was wrong it wasn’t particularly horrible.

The dog ran up to the cage, his big wet nose prodding against the tiny wire bars. “My love are you injured? My love how are you?! How do I get you out of this?”

“I don’t know but I want to take my carrot with me,” Junmyeon focused on the important things.

Junmyeon heard the human shouting and then he was back, a white cat in his arms, hugged tightly to his chest. Minho whined and edged towards the cage.

“You scared me so much Lu Han, never do that again!” The human hugged the fluffy cat.

“This is not the plan, not the plan, he shouldn’t be back yet. Not the plan! Wow that food smells great. Junmyeon, doesn’t that smell great?” Minho whined.

Somewhere outside there were coos and then a commotion, the sound of tiny little legs on plaster and the yell of a human, Minho’s human.

“Cockroaches!” the human holding the cat screeched.

Junmyeon could see the army filtering in, hear Tao giving commands. Minho began to nudge the cage hard, in a few seconds the door sprang open. Junmyeon grabbed the carrot in his mouth and hopped through the opening.

“I need to carry you in my mouth my love, there is no other way,” Minho barked.

Junmyeon froze. _Become one with your surroundings. Become one with…_

He was lifted up, carrot and all, Minho gently holding him by the nape. It was different than when he was a baby, he wasn’t being tasted but gingerly carried.

Minho trotted towards the open apartment door, Junmyeon holding tight to his precious carrot. As they darted down the stairs Junmyeon could swear he caught a glimpse of Minseok running up them.

 

 

Minseok had lived his life on the streets, alone. Sure he had friends but that didn’t change the fact his life was tough, his existence was hard, and he didn’t have _a someone_. He watched Lu Han dart into the building alongside Minho and felt a depression set in. A hopelessness. A realization he would never get that good of a cleaning again in his life.

He made the decision at the time Baekhyun was spraying the human. He couldn’t let this go. He couldn’t let Lu Han go. He ran for the door, screeching at Sehun to keep it open. Once he was inside he followed Lu Han’s unique scent until he found another open door. He passed Minho and Junmyeon on the way up, he knew they were safe. And now…

He was in a human place with the human screaming and clutching Lu Han. But he was with Lu Han and he wasn’t going to leave the best lick of his life ever again.

 

 

 

Minho ran back to his yard, mindful of Junmyeon’s comfort. When they arrived he set the rabbit down before jumping back over the fence.

Junmyeon looked around then began to munch on his carrot. The dog watched him, waiting patiently until he was done.

“Do you still hate me? Please don’t hate me. I love you. I really, really love you,” Minho whined.

“I don’t hate you,” Junmyeon admitted. “I just…you come on really strong. Stop with the biting and picking up and loud love confessions and…wait, does your human grow carrots?” Junmyeon had never noticed the tiny garden considering he always ran past the place.

“Yeah, he does,” Minho glanced at the small plot his human had dug up earlier that year. “Why, you want one?”

Junmyeon nodded.

Minho was quick to fetch a carrot from the garden and bring it to his one true love. “Can I lick you?” Minho asked.

Junmyeon scrunched up his nose. “Yeah, if you give me another carrot.”

 

 

 

Sehun could smell Baekhyun approaching. It was that scent, the one that drove him mad. The one he wanted to be bathed in, the one that Baekhyun had sprayed towards the human.

“Hey babe, are you alright?” They were back at the park, Baekhyun likely ready for bed.

“I’m fine,” Sehun tried to sound calm but his voice was shaky.

“Sehun…” Baekhyun carefully considered his words. “Can I spray you?”

Sehun turned to the skunk, alarmed. How did he know?! “I never. Why. What–“

“Because I really want to,” Baekhyun whispered seductively.

Sehun swallowed. Well shit.

 

 

Zhi Xiang found Yixing in the big oak tree, a stoic expression on his face.

“You did great back there. Thank you and um, sorry for causing this mess.” Zhi Xiang kept a safe distance from the object of his affections.

“I’ve lied to you,” Yixing started, not looking at the pigeon. “I have a past. I wasn’t always like this I…”

“I don’t care who you used to be. I love you for what you are, all of you, no matter what,” Zhi Xiang husked.

“Really?” Yixing looked at the pigeon who had chased after him for years, ever since he had arrived in the neighborhood looking for a fresh start. “What if I told you I once carried a note that said Hey Fred, check out my hobby isn’t this cool for fifty miles?”

“I’d still love you,” Zhi Xiang answered.

“Zhi Xiang, I’ve seen pigeons have neon post it notes tied to their tiny legs.” Yixing choked back a coo. “I sat there and did nothing.”

“Roost with me. Please,” Zhi Xiang pled.

Yixing exhaled sharply. “I’ve always loved you but I was afraid.”

“You don’t need to be afraid.” Zhi Xiang edged closer and this time Yixing didn’t run away.

 

 

 

 

** Six months later **

 

Minseok yawned and stretched his legs, readjusting his position on the marron carpeted perch. Lu Han was next to him, snuggled into his side, his long white fur mixing with Minseok’s gray fur. The sun was bright, basking the cats in warmth – it was the perfect napping weather.

Somewhere behind them the tall human servant was talking to the other human he made strange noises with. Minho’s human, who was always over, laughing and kissing the human servant.

“I’m tired,” Lu Han purred, nuzzling Minseok.

“Hmm, me too.” Minseok loved this, loved that they spent their days like this.

The sound of cooing drew the cat’s attention to the window. Yixing landed on the sill and alongside him was Zhi Xiang.

“Hey guys, how’s it going?” Yixing asked cheerfully.

“Sleepy,” Lu Han yawned.

“You’re always sleepy. All you do is sleep,” Zhi Xiang sighed.

“But that’s what’s great, that’s all we do,” Minseok argued.

Yixing filled in the half-asleep cats, letting them know what was going on in the neighborhood. Minseok listened a bit more attentively than Lu Han, which made sense considering he knew everyone longer. Sure, they still would stop by under the window to chat, but it was Yixing who gave him all the juicy neighborhood gossip.

Sehun still reeked of skunk and was still complaining everyone avoided him. At the same time he was always smiling, the little pervert.

Junmyeon and Minho had become a couple, owing to Minho’s heroic rescue of Junmyeon (with his carrot intact and his stash of carrots a major incentive). The rabbit spent most days in Minho’s yard, munching on grass and forming a tentative friendship with Jongin.

Chanyeol and Jongdae were still together, driving everyone nuts, pun intended.

The kittens that Minseok used to lecture weren’t alone, one of Minseok’s most attentive pupils, Mark, had grown into a fine cat and was taking his place as the neighborhood cat mentor.

Zhi Xiang and Yixing were roosting together now, an interesting situation considering they shared a tree with Chanyeol. They made it work somehow. It was strange, it was Chanyeol who complained more about the love birds (pun intended) than the other way around.

Minseok, well, he was happier than he had ever been. He was with the love of his life. The lickings were amazing, his purrs were off the charts. Lu Han’s human servant was nice, readily taking in Minseok (okay, maybe Lu Han throwing a giant fit when he tried to separate them had something to do with it but still).

He had a bowl of food and water was plentiful. He spent the day sleeping. It was amazing. It was great. And most importantly he was not alone. He would never be alone again.

Lu Han felt the same. He no longer whined about being kept under lock and key by his human servant. He claimed he found all the adventure he ever needed. Plus, he pointed out, it really was much nicer to nap in front of a window than to go looking for food. Much nicer.


End file.
